Having made it through Edexcel marking and Clearing more or less in one piece I'm now starting to look at jobs and I've found one I want to apply for.

I've become rather stymied by the "Do you consider yourself to have a disability" question. Thing is, I'm much better than I was, I have to be or I wouldn't consider applying for jobs at all and those closest to me wouldn't let me, but I've been off work for a year, and a year long gap doesn't look good on a CV. I'm still seeing my counsellor and I'm still on happy pills, and though I'm winding down visits to my counsellor I'm probably going to be on the pills for at least another year to make sure I'm properly better and try and stop any relapse. Apparently the first year is when I'm most vulnerable to it. My gut says I should declare it, but I also feel like a bit of a fraud for even considering it.

"The University operates under the Two ticks scheme which means we will interview all applicants with a disability who meet the minimum criteria for a job vacancy and consider them on their abilities". This is rather valuable, and I feel it's my only shot at an interview given the huge gap on my CV when I was essentially "doing nothing", but am I really disabled as it's counted?

The University say: When answering this question, please note that under the Disability Discrimination Act 1995 a disability is defined as ‘a mental or physical impairment which has a substantial and long term effect upon your ability to carry out normal day to day activities.’.

[Poll #1246569]

(Please post any expansion on this or thoughts in comments below)

I can't help but feel that this would all be easier if I were visibly physically disabled.

Any (helpful) advice or comments you lot could give would be really great. I'm feeling very mixed up about this, and a tad anxious about giving the "wrong" answer if I'm completely honest. I mean, I was never on benefits while off work (the forms scared me) so never really "disabled" in the eyes of the government. I just don't know what to say :|

Honestly, it's days like this that make me wonder if I'll ever be a useful member of society again! (I should write a CBT sheet for that thought I suppose)

Anyway, I woke up in a pretty good mood and went to collect the post. The first one I opened was from HM Revenue and Customs. I should mention at this point that I am waiting on money (over £500) to come back from them that I overpaid in tax last year. This has been going on for four months. I sent them a letter when I got my P60 from Kent (which was when I realised just how many squillions of pounds I had overpaid) enclosing my P60 and my forms from edexcel (essentially a payslip, but it's all they give me - edexcel don't issue P60s). When I first called in April to find out what I needed to do to claim back my tax I was told these forms would be sufficient. I got a letter in August (two months exactly since they recieved my original letter) asking me to fill out my employment history for 2006. I did that and sent it back. Cue the clock starting again on my claim (they say it'll be up to two months from the date of my last communication arriving with them). More or less two months since I sent back that form I get another letter today, saying that they've sent back my P60 (which wasn't enclosed) and that my stuff from edexcel was not sufficient, despite what I had been told four months ago.

At the moment I seem to be able to go between extremes of emotions. I ended up getting very angry very quickly and I called them and first yelled at the person who answered the phone and then requested a supervisor and yelled at her. When I'd yelled at them for about 20 minutes about how the legnth of time wasn't acceptable, nor was the fact my P60 was MIA, nor was the conflicting advice I had got from their office I got off the phone to them and burst in to tears. I went from angry to very sad and virtually helpless in a matter of seconds. Now I feel bad for yelling at them. I've done jobs like that and I know it's not their fault, but I was very angry and had to take it out on someone. I called edexcel who don't do P60s and are instead sending me a statement of earnings. I'm now more than a little terrified. I am waiting for them to send me the right document as soon as possible. I'm basically combining the incompetence of Edexcel with the incompetence of the tax office. I'm starting to wonder if I'll see my money this side of Christmas.

As I said above, it's days like this that make me wonder if I can ever be a useful member of society again. It probably doesn't help that my hormones are all over the place at the moment, as I have come off the pill to see if it helps with my depression. At the moment though I just feel even more out of whack than before. Argh. I'm also annoyed at myself. It's moments like this that I feel a real burden on those who are close to me, especially my husband. Don't worry, I'm not going to do anything silly, I've never been that depressed. I just needed to get it all out. There.

By the way, I still haven't filled in the forms for Incapacity Benefit. I'm so scared of getting them wrong. Wow. Talk about lame excuses.

Huzzah! Stretching has been adequately carried out (I rekkon I may have got an extra size out of it). I melded suggestions from here, Ben and the ever lovely CBBers and came up with a solution which appears to have worked (boobs no longer squashed, tummy lumps less obvious and the feeling of being put in a straightjacket lessened!)

For those of you who find that you need to do a similar thing in future, here is how the great achievement was won ;)

Basically the tshirt was well soaked in the bath and then wrung out so it was damp. Then we used a coathanger for trousers a bit like this one (except the cheap crappy asda equivilent which meant the edge of the tshirt had to be turned over a couple of times to get it to grip properly) on one of the side edges and hung it from the bathroom door.

On the other side edge (now at the bottom) we put another of those coat hangers and from the bottom of this (the part that usually hooks over the clothes rail) we hung a carrier bag from with a litre carton of OJ in it.

We left it to dry and then repeated it in the morning so in all it had about 24 hours on the rack.

In the end the TV Crews and photographers from the local rags came in and did their thing (there will be more tomorrow when clearing is actually open including possibly some of the national papers) and I was interviewed by BBC Radio Kent. No idea when/if I'll be on, but if you're in the area and you hear a clearing opererator named "Elizabeth" talking then that's me! All this in the name of corporate publicity for the university (who decreed the tshirts had to be visible all around *sigh* so the people under the aircon froze and people who didn't fit into the tshirts properly and hadn't stretched them looked uncomfortable)!

I'm so relieved it's over and thankful to all of you who commented on my last post I cannot even express it :D

This post is sponsored by a poke from greenfurrymoose who poked me on facebook to find out what had happened with this :)

It's a been a nice few days despite the fact that I hate my job and my computer, Aragorn, is misbehaving - it kernel oopses and locks up when data is being pushed at it over the network (but not pulled). After changing the hard disks, power supply, network card and network cable we ran memtest and a few minutes ago the screen lit up red with errors. I think we may have just tickled the problem ;) I hope it's that simple - if it's not it means an upgrade of motherboard, ram and processor we can ill afford (who can?!)

The first nice thing was that Liz and Si came to Canterbury for a rare visit and between them, me and benc and pao we sacrificed a couple of duck and many pork dumplings at Cafe de China which I don't think I've been to since my birthday in November. Yum.

Once the duck had been well and truly sacrificed pao went home to tend to mrspao who is ill :( (get well soon!) and Liz and Si came to our local pub, The Dog, Rough Common (which has improved immensely under new management) and played a couple of games of pool and drank beer (or in Si's case, pisswater :P).

This evening we met up with fooflington and rahslowe on the beach for some fish and chips. Rah was mad and went in the sea :P Later on Laura, Jase and Laura's sister Lizzie came along too and there was more sea-ness by Rah and Laura. A little later as it was getting cold and dark (and feeling like April again instead of June) Foo, Rah, Ben and I went to the pub where the men drank beer (Whitstable Bay and Early Bird) and we played pool. Rah and I lost badly :(

So anyway, now I smell of smoky pub, which is bad, but I've had a couple of lovely days with my friends so I really don't mind.

Thanks guys :)

It's a been a nice few days despite the fact that I hate my job and my computer, Aragorn, is misbehaving - it kernel oopses and locks up when data is being pushed at it over the network (but not pulled). After changing the hard disks, power supply, network card and network cable we ran memtest and a few minutes ago the screen lit up red with errors. I think we may have just tickled the problem ;) I hope it's that simple - if it's not it means an upgrade of motherboard, ram and processor we can ill afford (who can?!)

The first nice thing was that Liz and Si came to Canterbury for a rare visit and between them, me and benc and pao we sacrificed a couple of duck and many pork dumplings at Cafe de China which I don't think I've been to since my birthday in November. Yum.

Once the duck had been well and truly sacrificed pao went home to tend to mrspao who is ill :( (get well soon!) and Liz and Si came to our local pub, The Dog, Rough Common (which has improved immensely under new management) and played a couple of games of pool and drank beer (or in Si's case, pisswater :P).

This evening we met up with fooflington and rahslowe on the beach for some fish and chips. Rah was mad and went in the sea :P Later on Laura, Jase and Laura's sister Lizzie came along too and there was more sea-ness by Rah and Laura. A little later as it was getting cold and dark (and feeling like April again instead of June) Foo, Rah, Ben and I went to the pub where the men drank beer (Whitstable Bay and Early Bird) and we played pool. Rah and I lost badly :(

So anyway, now I smell of smoky pub, which is bad, but I've had a couple of lovely days with my friends so I really don't mind.

Thanks guys :)

Last week was something of a week of suffering for me. I work in the Marlowe (formerly Physics) building in which was situated the main polling station for the Student Union Elections which meant that for four days last week I was subjected to the noise of the candidates canvassing outside. By the end of the four days I was about ready to commit mass murder on the screaming hoardes outside my window. Luckily campaining ended at 4pm on Thursday and the noise shut up soon after, minutes, I am sure before I was about to go postal. They got noisier day on day. The final day was absolute hell. I come in every morning at the moment and am glad for the peace and quiet outside :)

This did mean I got very involved in the election, in that I had candidates I wanted to win (those who pissed me off least - "Sam for Mens" in particular - his guitar playing entertained me) and those I wanted to lose (those who pissed me off most - yes "TomTom for Education", "Vicks for Welfare", "Sophie for President" and "Nathan for Mens (and student trustee)", I'm looking at you). I was glad to see in the latest inQuire that for the most part my choices got in (or lost, depending on how you look at it). Clearly other people had the same reasons for voting for a person that I did. BWhahaha. Some people were clearly bitter. A quote in inQuire suggests that "Sophie for President" was at the very least feeling somewhat let down: "[She]expected not to win...I'm a white middleclass student running against a block vote." I'm not quite sure what she meant by that but it may have something to do with the fact that her winning opponent was black.

All this and still less than a fifth of students voted.

This weekend (having spent Friday in a daze recovering from the sheer amount of noise made by the SU electioneers) we went to my mums so Ben could cable her house (it looks lovely BTW - and took hours!). We met foo and rah there as foo was laying a laminate floor for mum in the small bedroom. Rah and mum and I went to Greenwich market to meet Phil and leave the men to be grr-manly. Saw many lovely things and have begun to covet a hair thingy that can be brought online here and pimped by rahslowe who had enough money to buy one here (her hair was almost the only persons who couldn't be held by one!).

I want.

If anyone has a spare £15 please buy me one (I like which is called a Dupla). Please? O:) Contact details here.

Finally, I got to try on mum's corset. I want. Muchly. I won't ask for this one - I know I shan't get!

Piccies of the few days are here (mum's), here (foo's), and here (foo's pics of me in a corset).


Photograph courtesy of Matthew Slowe

Oof. That was a mammoth update! Sorry!

While working I just noticed something - perhaps someone can explain to me why it happens.

When using Excel (as I frequently do at work) I had 3 or 4 documents open at once. I closed one and they all closed.

Why does it do this? It's really really annoying! It doesn't even happen in Word! Granghgharagrgy!!

Stupid M$ shite :|

While working I just noticed something - perhaps someone can explain to me why it happens.

When using Excel (as I frequently do at work) I had 3 or 4 documents open at once. I closed one and they all closed.

Why does it do this? It's really really annoying! It doesn't even happen in Word! Granghgharagrgy!!

Stupid M$ shite :|

Thanks to rahslowe for telling me about the Uni Temp Bank I have a job for at least three days (9:30-3 so I can still do job with kids) doing data type stuff :) Not the most exciting thing in the world, but I'm good at it and it stresses me out far less than teaching. I should be paid at the end of November which means (yay!) we have earmarked the money for Christmas presents.

Yay! Three days work here I come!

In other news, I think Autumn is definately here. I'm cold :(

I'm doing Clearing Hotline for UKC this year and start in 2 and a half hours. I'm really nervous. We've had three days training/practice, but it hardly prepares you for the real thing.

Just in case anyone in the area watches the BBC South East/Meridian local news, there's a good chance we'll be featured on those programs either at lunchtime or at tea time (or both!) and you might spot me!

I've also been interviewed for Radio1 - if anyone listens to that and hears someone that sounds like me talking about clearing it *is* me. I won't hear it. I don't listen to Radio1 and I'll be clearing from 8:30 - 5, but if anyone hears me and wants to record it, go for it. New things to crige at++ ;)

I've also been interviewed by KMFM. I might hear this one as I listen to their morning news. That would be really weird. Well, when I say Interviewed I mean, they recorded me taking a fake call and might use some of it. We'll see I guess :) If anyone hears this and wants to record it, go for it ;) Again, new things to cringe at++

Finally, if anyone on my Friends list is getting A-Level results and if pleasantly surprised or dissappointed or has previously had them and is not at Uni but wants to, call clearing. We're pretty good really and will help you get into Uni. I think it's worth it - 3 of the best years of my life were spent at Uni.

Give it a go, you have nothing to lose...except me my sanity ;)

*is nervous*

Having *finally* got an ADSL connection (albeit a very flaky one) at 6mc I have uploaded all the pictures that were waiting :)

Ph33r :P

You remember the story of me getting in contact with an old friend? Well the 29th May was her birthday so I toodled along to her house for the party. I had a lovely time, especially making use of the trampoline :P Piccies of that event (including me on the trampoline here.

My last shift with the children was on Friday morning and I got some of the most fun and beautiful presents I could ever have wished for. I got a bear and a thing full of hot chocolate and a game for two to play in the bath >:) The cards and letters were the worst though. I didn't cry when I was there but I came back home and *howled* about it all. PIctures of almost everything (including becky's letter which is by far the worst) are here.

My results were posted on the boards at the back of the library at 5pm on Friday. I swore I would not be involved in the scrum that ensues once the humanities guy turns up with the lists, but after a little encouragement from ben, there I was, right in the middle. I went back yesterday to preserve the result for posterity ;) I'm glad I won't have to do *that* wait ever again!

Samphire Hoe is where Ben and I went after I got my degree results. I was so full of nervous energy the walk did me good. It was really beautiful though Ben suffered because of the high concentration of pollen there. Well worth a visit. For more info see this.

Finally, yesterday I got round to setting up aragorn despite the lack of desk... Aragorn's new home is perched on top of two Dell boxes and another computer - see this picture for how unstable the whole arrangement actually looks ;)

Ok - all piccies done now - have a look, especially at the Samphire Hoe ones :)

*bumbles off*

Edit: I forgot to mention the lovely rainbow I saw a few days ago :) Go look! :D

Well I knew my last day would be hard - I just hoped it wouldn't be *that* hard.

Proper update with photos of presents and cards later, when I get to a place with proper intermahweb.

They made me cry :(

Well I knew my last day would be hard - I just hoped it wouldn't be *that* hard.

Proper update with photos of presents and cards later, when I get to a place with proper intermahweb.

They made me cry :(

I apologise for the angst in this entry - I promise it won't last.

Haven't been sleeping properly this past week and today is the big day... no - not the wedding :P Today I finish my job with the children (:'() and get my degree result (very scary).

I just want today to be over now...

I feel rather better now about the mormon thing I mentioned in my last post, largely because of something ben said ("We should be glad he's in the top 100, after all he proves at least one fiftieth of the United States to be idiots").

Last night at work was funny. Becky was doing an international week quiz for school. One of the questions was "Where was Mozart born?" ( Becky said... ) I asked Tom if he knew. ( Thomas said... ) ( Mozart was really born in... ) The other amusing answer was to the question "Which country has two official languages, English and French?". ( Becky guessed at... )

Was a very amusing evening :) I'll miss those kids :|

I feel rather better now about the mormon thing I mentioned in my last post, largely because of something ben said ("We should be glad he's in the top 100, after all he proves at least one fiftieth of the United States to be idiots").

Last night at work was funny. Becky was doing an international week quiz for school. One of the questions was "Where was Mozart born?" ( Becky said... ) I asked Tom if he knew. ( Thomas said... ) ( Mozart was really born in... ) The other amusing answer was to the question "Which country has two official languages, English and French?". ( Becky guessed at... )

Was a very amusing evening :) I'll miss those kids :|

I currently have a part time job working with two lovely children who live and go to school near UKC. I graduate this July and I'm looking for someone to hand the job over to. There will be a 5 year old boy and a 9 year old girl, both really nice children. Hours are 7:45-8:45 in the morning and 3:30-5/6 in the evening. Pay is £5-6p/h which usually works out between £60 and £80 per week. School holidays you get off and days off are fairly easy to arrange. It's a good job and I'd really like to find my replacement so I know the children will be in good hands :)

If you are interested please email me at livejournal at carina dot org dot uk or comment for more details :)

Crossposted to canterbunnies and ukc

I have an announcement to make:

( clicky )

Among the things I have been doing at my school placement is helping with lots of classes. I help in at least one class of every year group except year nine (no lessons on Tuesdays/Fridays). Today was my day with the tinies (years seven and eight)* and turned out to be great. Second period I was with a very low achieving year eight group (we're talking the lowest set) and I've been in a few lessons with them before. Typically getting them to learn or engage is like pulling teeth, but today they switched on and wanted to learn about Isambard Kingdom Brunel. They asked me for help and thanked me for helping them. They went away having learnt something and I felt great for helping them to achieve that.

Third period I helped in the year seven class. I've been helping with them for a while too and this class is completely different. They're still enthusiastic in a way that no other year group is. They don't quite have the secondary school jaded scepticism yet. Anyway, they've been doing a topic on Castles this term and the past few lessons they've been making a castle out of cardboard to help them remember the structure of a castle and what castles have in them. They did everything only being reminded of the scale of it sometimes. Today they painted it. Here are the results. Aren't they great? :D

( Castle! )

It was a very tiring but a very rewarding day, capped by a little boy (4 years old) coming in from nursery covered in chocolate (from easter chocolate related activities at aforementioned nursery) and giving me a hug and a kiss. I love that little boy. I shall treasure that chocolatey hand print on my white tshirt ;) He's so sweet! Why oh why do they have to grow up :(

Tomorrow is the scary scary thing. I have my interview at Christchurch. Am really quite scared now. I'm sort of prepared. I hope it's enough.

Feedback would be good on my idea for a source though. I'm supposed to take a source in and say how I'd use it to introduce a topic. My idea was for a picture like ( this ) to introduce the holocaust to key stage 4 pupils (14-16 year olds). (Picture here in original context) I'm thinking this picture could be used to start that topic with questions posed to the teenagers such as "Why do you think there is a pile of shoes here?" "How did they come to be stacked like that" "Why do you think their owners don't need them any more" etc.

What do you lot think? Is there a better way of doing this? A better topic/source I could use?

Any and all help appreciated :S

*for anyone not familiar with this style of naming year groups, year 7 is the lowest at a British high school, with the children in it being 11 or 12 typically

[edit] My watch strap broke this evening so I'm without watch. I feel all naked and horrid :( If anyone has a spare watch they want to lend me before my interview... ;)

My pictures of the recent snow, the first snowman I can rememeber building and campus and Canterbury looking lovely are here.

My personal favourite is ( here )

The snow yesterday was really fun. Had the day off and came to campus with ben (I got the call saying school was shut when I was dropping him off so it seemed sensible...) and took some great pictures (see above for url). Met a really nice girl who looked like she was from a hot country. She came over to us as we were "clearing the car"* and asked us to take a piccie of her in the snow, so we did. Then she asked for a piccie with me (in my cold weather gear of jumper, headscarf*, wooly scarf* and huge gloves *grin*

Jibbled inside where it was safe and warm all day and after ben finished work we headed up to the field near where I live and ben taught me how to build a snowman. ( see here :D )

I like snow (for the most part). Especially when it's the nice stuff.

Unfortunately today the snow is dangerous slush and I fell over taking the children to school. Estates still have not gritted and I have wet and cold toes.

At least I have the piccies to remind me how pretty it all was :)

Finally, happy birthday Sophie :D

*read "having a snowball fight"
*a present from no1typo after her latest trip to mallorca
*knitted by no1typo for me the year I started Uni

My pictures of the recent snow, the first snowman I can rememeber building and campus and Canterbury looking lovely are here.

My personal favourite is ( here )

The snow yesterday was really fun. Had the day off and came to campus with ben (I got the call saying school was shut when I was dropping him off so it seemed sensible...) and took some great pictures (see above for url). Met a really nice girl who looked like she was from a hot country. She came over to us as we were "clearing the car"* and asked us to take a piccie of her in the snow, so we did. Then she asked for a piccie with me (in my cold weather gear of jumper, headscarf*, wooly scarf* and huge gloves *grin*

Jibbled inside where it was safe and warm all day and after ben finished work we headed up to the field near where I live and ben taught me how to build a snowman. ( see here :D )

I like snow (for the most part). Especially when it's the nice stuff.

Unfortunately today the snow is dangerous slush and I fell over taking the children to school. Estates still have not gritted and I have wet and cold toes.

At least I have the piccies to remind me how pretty it all was :)

Finally, happy birthday Sophie :D

*read "having a snowball fight"
*a present from no1typo after her latest trip to mallorca
*knitted by no1typo for me the year I started Uni

We have proper proper snow :D It's proper powdery stuff :D Yay! :D Campus will obviously grind to a halt later because estates haven't gritted yet. I have had two snowfights with ben and I can't rememeber having had that much fun snowfighting before. Of course, it was all done in a good cause - I got the car cleared :D

I got loads of piccies which I shall put up later when I get home where my USB cable lives :) I feel so bouncy happy right now :D

I got to uni to drop off ben and got a call from rahslowe who told me fooflington heard on the radio that Blean School where I work (well, take the kids to) is shut so I called up Sue who told me yes it was and the kids were off and so was Andy so I don't have to go in.

I have a snow day!

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

*bouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebouncebounce*

squeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

*bounces off in ---> that direction*

So after coming down from getting my 62 I..umm...Oh - went to work :) In the evening I met Wendy properly for the first time I seem to recall. She's nice :) Ben came over and we had pasta and watched SG1. Today I have gotten wet lots cos of nasty rain, peered in at teh freshers fair and tonight I;m babysitting Paul and Becky while Tom goes to look at Barton Court.

That's about it.

( Quizzes )

So after coming down from getting my 62 I..umm...Oh - went to work :) In the evening I met Wendy properly for the first time I seem to recall. She's nice :) Ben came over and we had pasta and watched SG1. Today I have gotten wet lots cos of nasty rain, peered in at teh freshers fair and tonight I;m babysitting Paul and Becky while Tom goes to look at Barton Court.

That's about it.

( Quizzes )

I now have my Provisional Timetable:

Monday 10am - 1pm HI603/HI604 MUSEUMS AND THE NATIONAL HERATAGE

Thursday 1pm - 4pm HI652/HI653 THE GREAT WAR, BRITISH CULTURE, MEMORY AND HISTORY

Not bad really, especially as both of the kids have clubs on a Thursday afternoon till gone 4. Gives me lots of time to do the reading and prep and things :)