Filtered (not mum): Another update

[lizziec]

I'm up at mum's now. I brought stuff for several days just in case, and some new pj's for mum, cos she was getting sick of the ones she already had.

More news on what's going on.

The tumour appears to be attached to, and on the back of, her left cheekbone. The doctor she saw today thinks that it is a secondary tumour because of the position it is in. Apparently it's super rare for a primary tumour to be in the position that this one is in, so they're currently playing hunt the primary tumour. They did a CT scan of her abdomen today (to go with the one of her head they did last Thursday) and couldn't find it there, so they're going to do an MRI, hopefully tomorrow, in the hope of picking up where it is. If they can't find it, they're going to biopsy the tumour they *can* find as apparently that will tell them where it came from. And then they can decide how to treat it.

When she got back from the hospital she had me call round the list of primary people to keep informed, which I now have written with numbers in a document on my laptop. Everyone was very nice - almost too nice as I was nearly in tears a couple of times and I'm really trying to make sure I don't cry around mum.

I seem to be oscillating between super-organiser, trying to do all the practical stuff I can, and tears, which is most definitely not helpful or practical. Sometimes though my super practical air takes on a rather morbid and unhelpful tone and I start wondering if I should be sorting out Solicitors for will-making and so on, and I know we're not there yet and it's not the right thing to be thinking, but those thoughts keep creeping in.

red_pill is being awesome, and making me Fajitas for dinner. He's also going to learn to drive, which is very responsible and slightly scary of him. Mum's talking about getting a bed for the spare room after payday, with a view to me having a proper bed to sleep in when I'm here, and some space for just me. Speaking of which, I need to badger Phil and go start clearing that room a little bit together.

Hopefully we'll learn more tomorrow and we can all start to make some sort of a plan for some sort of routine.

Sorry if this entry is rather all over the place, but that pretty much sums up my brain at the moment.

ETA: 12/07/11 No longer filtered

Comments

[barakta]

I seem to be oscillating between super-organiser, trying to do all the practical stuff I can, and tears, which is most definitely not helpful or practical.

I suspect this is entirely normal as you *have* to do organisation but it is very hard so yoou're pushing down crying type stuff and then it's got to come out sometime/where. I think it's ok to do even morbid things just as long as whatever you do does make you feel better and be useful and not make you feel worse etc.

Phil learning to drive is an excellent idea, I hope he doesn't find it too difficult. Spare room sounds like a definite plan if you're going to be needed at your mum's a lot.

Thank you for the update, you don't have to but it's helpful. If there's anything we can do (or not do) let us know - but I know a lot of it is just sitting tight and waiting for information to become available.

Hang in there, your brain will get somewhere eventually and allowing yourself space and time to be wibbly is a good thing cos it's not like the situation doesn't suck.

[bethanthepurple.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the update. Will be in London some point during Easter holidays if you want to hand over some washing up to do. Or not, all is cool. x

[alisondh.livejournal.com]

You're bound to be a bit all over the place (that doesn't make sense, but you know what I mean), especially as you've now got more waiting to do rather than knowing that this is the position and these are the treatment options. Hope that they're able to establish where the primary is ASAP and then get on with sorting out some treatment.

Thinking of you both.

[mrs-redboots.livejournal.com]

I'm not surprised you feel all over the place just now; this is a lot for you to have to deal with while being there for your mother.

Here is a safe space for you to vent, either privately or to us.

And it's okay to feel what you feel - don't let anybody tell you how you ought to react; your reactions are totally valid and proper.

Lots of hugs and good thoughts.

[mostlysilent.livejournal.com]

Just caught up with things, but I'm not sure what else I can do other than send *hugs*. Let us know if there's anything we can help with!